xHamster with Cream™

xHamster has always been a virtual home for the porn community — and now, it’ll be a physical one, too!

Introducing xHamster with Cream™, a new line of 18+ coffee shops featuring hot espresso and coffee drinks, juicy smoothies, glazed morning buns, thick breakfast sausages and your choice of creampies.

Best of all? The wifi will always be free and unfiltered.

“With the increasing restrictions online — digital censorship in the UK and China, porn taxes in the US, bans on adult content on Facebook, Instagram and Tumblr, porn fans need a safe haven to get their fix,” says Alex Hawkins, Vice President of Retail Development.

xHamster with Cream™ will provide customers with hot beverages and hotter content,” says Hawkins. “Plus, with Starbucks CEO Howard Shultz stepping down to run for US President, we sensed a market opportunity.”

In the past few years, more and more mainstream restaurants, including Starbucks, have installed filters blocking adult content on their wifi.

Hawkins says the first outpost of the xHamster with Cream™ chain will be in Los Angeles’ San Fernando Valley, home to many adult production studios. Additional locations, including Las Vegas, Berlin, San Francisco, Salt Lake City and Washington, DC are scheduled for 2020 openings.

“We looked for locations with unusually high porn consumption,” says Hawkins. “They’re desperate for a fix.”

Hawkins promises the xHamster with Cream™ bathrooms will be large and private, with strong wifi connections even with a closed door.

While xHamster with Cream™ menus will vary from location to location, xHamster has released a secret menu for the San Fernando Valley’s April 1 opening.